June 29, 2021 3 min read

Oh, self worth. What a concept! I truly didn’t realize my worth until one summer when I was at church, I am pretty sure I cried every time I went to service that summer. I was releasing years of lies that I had told myself. I started to release that I wasn’t good enough, pretty enough, thin enough, loved enough. When I say I would cry, I mean I would cry! Thankfully there happened to always be tissues around.  

I started to realize there was a source of love in the world that didn’t have conditions, and would never leave. The concept that someone/something could love me so much that nothing I do would make them turn away from me. The Universe, higher power, I refer to Him as God, and that summer He brought me to tears as I learned how loved I truly am. This is when I started to build my foundation on my worth.

Building Your Worth on Unstable Ground

I remember how panicked I was my junior year of college. I was in my room looking in the mirror terrified about how much “weight I had gained.” I thought my whole world was spinning out of control. The insults were flying in my head. I wish that it clicked then, but it would be years before I finally realized my worth is not dependent on anything external. It is not even dependent on anything internal. My worth, just like your worth is solid and never changing. You were born with it. It is this unconditional love that I needed to start building my life on.

You were born to be this amazing being. Whole, loved, with a purpose. And as we grow I think sometimes we forget this. We forget that we are special and unique. We start to take on lies we hear or labels that are given to us. We start to try to control life, we start to fight against who we are, and we start to build our worth on conditions.

Since I was thirteen I started building my worth on having a boyfriend and my weight. Two horrible things to build your worth on because #1 they are external and sometimes out of my control, #2 they can change, #3 I give all my power away.

Your Worth Never Changes

Your worth never changes. It doesn’t change whether you are sitting on the couch all day, or running a marathon. Whether you feel like you are failing or succeeding. WORTH NEVER CHANGES. Also, we all share the same worth. We were all born worthy and loved for exactly who we are.

This is sometimes a hard concept to grasp, but it is just truth. When you can build your worth on the foundation of love, it will not crumble. It won’t change if you gain weight or not. I always believe we are operating in life from one of two places love or fear. Choosing to put your worth in conditions is operating from fear. It can change its mind, it shifts and changes, but when you choose love, love is solid. It is open to others and experiences, it is respect for yourself.

The summer of 2017 I decided to start building my life on the foundation of love. It took time, and whenever I had a negative experience I would remind myself that I am still worthy. When I looked in the mirror and hated my body, I am still worthy. When I was sad because I was single, I was still worthy. When I was afraid to accomplish something, I am still worthy! You are worthy!

Understanding Your Worth

For the next week, start to acknowledge areas in your life you started building your self esteem on. Maybe it is your body image. Maybe it is having a certain car, money, or a significant other. Start to shift your perspective. I want you to start to realize your worth. Realize it is not measurable. Your worth is grounded in Love. Start to tell yourself that you are worthy, especially if you feel like you just messed up or made a mistake. When I decided to build my life upon Love, things started shifting for me. My life became stable, and I started to believe in myself again. Remember you are loved, and you are worthy exactly as you are right here in this moment.

Elissa Curry
Elissa Curry


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